We are Young; But We Have Heart

Ariel Gets a Vagina from a Witch & Jasmine Seduces a Snake: A Closer Look into Two Disney Films

2009-04-24T00:03:31Z

Wow, a lot of you really want to read this XD Well, here it is. The title is probably the best part but hopefully you find it enjoyable. 8D You are more than welcome to leave commentary and tell me what parts you liked or could be improved.

The Little Mermaid and Aladdin are two Disney films made in the early nineties. Both movies tell the stories of individuals who wish to live a better life than the one they are living at the beginning. These movies enforce a lot of stereotypes and roles for both males and females despite being made in “modern times.” The actions and language enforce the roles used in the movie, presenting a view of what people should expect from the roles played by different genders. The generation that grew up on these films (and others by Disney) beliefs are expected to be liberal concerning what roles males and females can play in society, and yet these films display characters acting in ways that are extremely similar and typical of the stereotypes set up by society. Even the antagonists in the films are living models of old stereotypes but they are exaggerated and twisted aspects of the heroic characters of the films.

Gender roles are extremely typified in these films. The father figure dominates the daughter until a hansom young man comes along and “takes her away” from him. The Little Mermaid and Aladdin both incorporate this idea and marriage is extremely important to this. After all, is that not what happens in the actual wedding ceremony? Concerning marriage there are “three modern Western culture-bound preconceptions: (1) that marriage for love or persona attraction is morally superior to marriage for money or power…; (2) that authentic union must be underwritten by emotional attachment...; and (3) that personal autonomy or individual desire in the selection of a marriage partner should outweigh the claims of the family” (McDonald 265-266). While these are all taken into account in the Disney films, it also needs to be kept in mind that the third point does not explicitly apply, since while Jasmine and Ariel could marry without their fathers’ consent they do not. Both seek their fathers’ approval for the unions despite having decided whom they are going to marry. Between the two films, the female’s roles are limited to daughter, princess, wife, and arguably, in the future, mother (leaving the role of ‘witch’ out, which will be discussed later). The roles of daughter, wife, and mother are specifically significant because they are roles that are constantly subjugated to another role, such as father and husband.

The “alpha generation” is the generation that was heavily influenced by these films as children. Dan Kindlon, the author of Alpha Girls argues, “Women…have often had to compromise their personal ambitions to fulfill more traditional domestic roles. But our sense was that if members of the alpha generation choose to stop working when they have ids it will be a choice, not a necessity that has been forced upon then” (213). Despite that generation’s apparent “choices,” the media is still portraying women having only those “traditional domestic roles.” Jasmine and Ariel, while they are free to make a choice, are only allowed to choose between one male influence and another. They cannot be independent of male dominance, as Kindlon would suggest they have the “choice” to. This greatly influences the “choices” modern females have, since generally the only choice that is acceptable is marriage. Considering neither Ariel nor Jasmine has a period of “singleness,” separated from their father and without needing or wanting a man, it is apparent that the idea of a woman being single is still greatly frowned upon. Feminine roles have not changed for the better, as many would like you to believe.

Most people would think that these particular Disney films celebrate the independence of women with their headstrong princesses who take control of their situations. However, this is not the case. In The Little Mermaid, for example, Ariel may at first seem independent by rebelling against her father’s orders, but she only does this in order to be with another man; replacing one controlling figure with another in the end. Sey Chassler’s article on how men have not changed discusses this very idea of the male figure as the controlling or dominant figure. Chassler wrote this article from his own experiences based with his wife and said the following, “It means that everything that occurs between us, everything we do together, is monitored by me” (135). Jasmine, in the movie Aladdin, demonstrates the same, moving from her role as daughter to the role of wife without any stage in between. Furthermore, the marriages in both movies are poorly prepared for. It is the marriage itself, not the relationship that is important. Both princesses hardly know the men they are becoming involved with: Ariel has only known Prince Eric for three days by the time they marry and Jasmine’s relationship to Aladdin is equally as short.

“Authority in the early modern family rested finally with the father…the principle that the woman was “the weaker vessel” and consequently dependent on the superior judgment and ability of her husband…gave the father uncontested rule over his wife and all members of the household” (McDonald, 259-260). It is clear from the passage that male dominance has been around for a long time and, subsequently, the subjugation of the female. The male authority in these films is the father figure (who is also ruler over their people, adding another power dynamic to their role). The Sultan in Aladdin expresses a concern that his daughter has not found a suitor yet and one of the main worries he expresses is “I just want to make sure your taken care of…provided for.” Again, the idea that a young female cannot take care of herself and needs a male in her life to take “care of” or “provide for” her is enforced. Granted, Jasmine scoffs at the idea but this is mostly because she does not approve of any of the suitors and wants to be free of any sort of obligation. She even goes so far as to say, “Maybe I don’t want to be a princess anymore.” Despite the fact that the Sultan does not pick Jasmine’s husband, he does change the law for her so that she can marry the man she chooses.

A better example of male dominance is actually Ariel’s father, King Triton, in The Little Mermaid. He constantly forbids her certain activities, especially those that involve the human world. Chassler expresses this idea in his article with the words “Men still make the moves…Someone makes the rules, someone else does as she is told” (pg 130). King Triton is noticeably intimidating because he is the only merman that plays any role in the movie. The father, being one of the only males in the very dominant female world, implies just how much influence a father has over her daughter. But the fact that Ariel goes against his wishes repeatedly to flirt around with the full man, Eric, says a lot about the control men have over women as expressed in the film.

Of course, more dominating than the fathers are the future husbands in the films. Eric is a full human male as opposed to Ariel’s father who is part “mermaid.” Eric is the one who actually holds Ariel’s freedom in his hands, not her father, because if he does not kiss her within three days she belongs to Ursula instead. By this point in the film, King Triton’s control has been completely stripped from him and is fought over by Eric and Ursula. Aladdin has a similar vie for power in Aladdin with Jafar. Aladdin only wants Jasmine while Jafar wants the position of ruler and Jasmine would just be an added bonus. It is not just about winning Jasmine over but also controlling her and her actions. This is what Jafar hopes to accomplish by having her, which Aladdin does not.

Jafar, the antagonist in Aladdin¸ and Ursula, the antagonist in The Little Mermaid both express desires similar to their protagonist counterparts. However, their desires are twisted versions of the protagonists and incorporate extreme gender stereotypes. The two are destroyed at the end of the film, a sign that society frowns on the characteristics exhibited by them.

Ursula is called many names in the film: “witch,” “demon,” “monster,” none of which are very feminine. Even her appearance reflects her monster status. She is a large woman with grey skin and black tentacles that could easily crush a man. Ursula’s tentacles play on the fear of a woman’s ability to “ensnare” someone, more specifically a man. However, the first person she ensnares in the movie is Ariel. She uses Ariel to get to not only Triton, but Eric as well. It is not really Ursula’s appearance that makes her so feared. It is the idea of an older woman with power that makes her the object of such fear. The idea that a woman of Ursula’s apparent age could have the power to “rule the oceans” without a man being involved is an uncomfortable idea for our society, even today.

Ursula is also extremely seductive. Her conversations with any of the characters in the film are accented by her husky voice and she is constantly invading personal space to get close to them, caressing and manipulating them with her words. If Ariel’s character is the pure hearted saint in the movie then Ursula is the seducer who wants to ensnare the others. This trait has been played out since before Shakespeare’s time, and while the idea of women using their sexuality is not as frowned upon today, Ursula uses her sexuality for the wrong reasons. She wants to dominate instead of being sexually vulnerable, which is how Ariel presents herself. After all, Ariel makes the wish to become human and in doing so obtains the very organ that will make her sexually vulnerable, the vagina. As Laura Kipnis points out in her own book, “a vagina is also an extremely costly attribute to lug around and makes a woman forever vulnerable” (123). The most disturbing quality is the overtly sexual overtones Ursula uses around Ariel as well. She is constantly caressing and treating Ariel as an object to be conquered. In this regard, Ursula’s role is much more masculine. Again, the overtones here are not at all compatible with the image one would normally want to see in association with young girls. Ursula is made into the villain because of this explicit relationship where she ensnares Ariel with her advances. Ariel is the only character around that Ursula even has the capacity to dominate despite the fact she is a powerful witch.

Jafar makes his own advances in Aladdin, but instead of going after Jasmine for her body and appearance (as Aladdin is), Jafar seeks Jasmine first for her position. Much like Ursula is attempted conquering of Ariel, the only reason Jafar wishes to wed Jasmine in the movie is so that he can increase his own public power. Both villains are seeking to overthrow the established power of the ruler. There is also the fact that Jafar is considerably older than Jasmine, just as Ursula is considerably older than Ariel. However, Jafar’s age is remarked on a lot more frequently than Ursula’s. So, his quest for power to obtain the throne and get Jasmine on the side becomes a rather perverted gesture. This is more of a comment on the age of a man than on his gendered role, clearly Aladdin is the better choice for Jasmine because he could produce heirs and have a successor to the throne. Jafar, on the other hand, is an old man who would probably have a bit of difficult producing any such heirs. However, this does not stop Jafar from attempting to claim Jasmine sexually. One of his attempted wishes is for “Princess Jasmine to fall desperately in love with me.” Jasmine uses Jafar’s lust for power against him, but there is no denying that the scene is extremely provocative in nature. It is a little odd that we are supposed to admire Jasmine’s actions in seducing Jafar into thinking he has won. Jasmine uses her body and good looks to her advantage and, as one might expect, ensnares Jafar in much the same way that was frowned upon for Ursula. This introduces the double standard of older women not being allowed to express their sexual desires while women of a younger generation are practically expected to do so.

Both Ariel and Jasmine are beautiful young girls in the movies with slim waists, gorgeous hair and, in Ariel’s case, a beautiful singing voices. They are part of what is known as the “beauty myth” referred to by Naomi Wolf in her book of the same title. “A beautiful heroine is a contradiction in terms, since heroism is about individuality, interesting, and ever changing, while “beauty” is generic, boring, and inert…Culture stereotypes women to fit the myth by flattening the feminine into beauty-without-intelligence or intelligence-without-beauty; women are allowed a mind or a body but not both” (Wolf, 59). While at first both Jasmine and Ariel seems to have both beauty and intelligence, at the end of both movies it boils down to their bodies and not their minds being the important factors. This is especially the case with Ariel who loses her voice in the movie, the only way she can speak her mind. Instead, Ariel must rely on her looks to get what she wants from Eric. Jasmine, too, falls into the same trap by the scene mentioned earlier to trick Jafar using her own sexual appeal. She does not attempt to outwit him or anything; she merely seduces him and distracts him with her body from discovering Aladdin stealing the lamp.

Jasmine and Ariel’s actions are mere reinforcements of the gender stereotype of the ‘damsel in distress’ myth. Aladdin is the one to save the day in the end of Aladdin, trapping Jafar after Jafar wishes to be a genie himself. Granted, this is Aladdin’s movie so being the hero is a little more acceptable. However, in The Little Mermaid it is not Ariel that saves the day and destroys Ursula. Instead, it is Eric, who rams the pointed end of a ship into the giant Ursula’s body and finishes her. Demonstrating that, in the end, even the most powerful of women will be taken down a peg and dominated by a man.

In the end, while both films depict a “happy ending” where the guy gets the girl, it sets unrealistic standards for children to look to in their own futures. The films depict cliché-gendered stereotype after cliché-gendered stereotype all while pretending that the female roles in the films present strong willed women who can do anything. In reality, however, those strong willed women end up in the same position as every woman: married and subject to a man.

Works Cited

Chassler, Sey. "Men Have Not Changed." Ed. Neal Bernards and Terry O'Neil. Male/Female Roles: Opposing Viewpoints. San Diego: Greenhaven P, 1989. 130-136.

Kindlon, Dan. “Alphas in Love.” Alpha Girls Understanding the New American Girl and How She Is Changing the World. New York: Rodale Books, 2006. 213-238.

Kipnis, Laura. “Vulnerability.” The Female Thing; Dirt, Envy, Sex, Vulnerability. New York: Vintage Books, 2006. 123-163.

McDonald, Russ. "Men and Women: Gender, Family, and Society." The Bedford Companion to Shakespeare. 2nd ed. Boston: Bedford/St. Martin's, 2001. 253-77.

Wolf, Naomi. “Culture.” The Beauty Myth: How Images of Beauty Are Used Against Women. New York: Anchor Books, 1992. 58-85.

Stolen from EVERYONE OMG!

2009-03-02T05:36:58Z

Give me a character I play and a question/topic about them and I will answer according to my own personal canon. This can range from their birthday, favorite color or even their earliest memory up to what they had last night for dinner.

daisychainrpg = Riza Hawkeye hawkeye_shooter, Toph rocktothetoph, Negi Springfield welshonionmage, Abarai Renji dreadthered, Giselle gorgeousgiselle, Thomas Raith sexandahaircut, and Haruka Tenoh goldenskyking

paixaorpg = Yuuko Ichihara mistress_yuuko, Static/Virgil Hawkins notabattery, Merlin blowmetobermuda and Karrin Murphy tinybutfierce

future permanent_way = Captain Maes Hughes (Bleach AU)

HMD

2009-01-10T04:33:23Z

The How's My Driving? Meme

Gotta Love Musicals

2008-12-04T03:36:24Z

Had to share this.

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

Look! Presents!

2008-12-01T23:20:15Z

Christmas Gift Toy & MySpace Layouts at pYzam.com

Daisychain Musings

2008-11-20T22:36:50Z

Seriously if you aren't part of the RP this isn't going to interest you at all. If you are, well, my conversation may be of interest due to late developments. Of course, I'm talking about events Here, involving Harry's use of Sight on Clover.

Bouncy Erbear (4:13:12 PM): i'm reading it and i'm like "yeah, i have no idea what the hell this means at all"

lynxgriffin (4:13:29 PM): what would your characters think it means? ;D

Bouncy Erbear (4:13:42 PM): if they could see what harry had just seen?

lynxgriffin (4:13:54 PM): yeah, or if Harry tells them

Bouncy Erbear (4:14:13 PM): ...lemme go read it again

lynxgriffin (4:14:21 PM): k XD

Bouncy Erbear (4:14:46 PM): the only two i can see Harry possibly telling is Riza and Thomas

Bouncy Erbear (4:14:58 PM): so i'll just try to figure out how they would see it

Bouncy Erbear (4:15:19 PM): obviously both of them would probably be a little confused as to why harry saw no indications of life and yet it came back...that should be impossible

Bouncy Erbear (4:16:44 PM): when you say it "appeared almost as an enormous construct or cage" i think metal which leads to a...robot...for some reason...I don't know if Riza would have that concept but I think both would wonder if the monster was actually natural after all...as natural as clover can be.

lynxgriffin (4:17:08 PM): I can say that Clover is as natural as can be and has no mechanical parts.

Bouncy Erbear (4:17:23 PM): is the cage/construct thing more symbolic then?

Bouncy Erbear (4:17:30 PM): :T or are you allowed to answer that

lynxgriffin (4:17:40 PM): um, I'll answer what I can XD;

lynxgriffin (4:17:57 PM): I'll just say that that is the best response I felt I could give if Harry were to try and see the "true nature" of Clover.

Bouncy Erbear (4:18:19 PM): the trapped woman though...that's giving clover almost human characteristics in a way

Bouncy Erbear (4:18:36 PM): well...i assume she's trapped

Bouncy Erbear (4:18:44 PM): it really just says "sounded like a woman screaming"

lynxgriffin (4:18:50 PM): yeah

lynxgriffin (4:18:53 PM): really, that could be anything :O

Bouncy Erbear (4:19:51 PM): deep within it's pained?

Bouncy Erbear (4:20:09 PM): it's hurt...i really think clover might be a pawn in all this as much as the other characters :Tb

lynxgriffin (4:20:21 PM): could be! There is no way of knowing! o_o

lynxgriffin (4:20:25 PM): at least for now

Bouncy Erbear (4:20:28 PM): yeah

Bouncy Erbear (4:20:43 PM): but as an english major i'm really focusing on your word choice and might just be reading too much into everything

lynxgriffin (4:21:04 PM): no no, I find it interesting XD

lynxgriffin (4:21:19 PM): so while I can't SAY one way or another, I like hearing what you think it is!

Bouncy Erbear (4:22:47 PM): the key parts i'm focusing in on are "an enormous construct or cage comprised of thick steel plates" the color "almost neon blue-green" the fact that the cage is closed and impossible to see in...which makes me think more of a sealed box than a cage cause cage makes me think like a zoo cage where you can see through the bars and what not....and then lastly "faint sound from within....like a woman screaming"

Bouncy Erbear (4:22:58 PM): i mean why that color

Bouncy Erbear (4:23:28 PM): and why a "woman screaming" you would think for clover it would be a "enraged beast howling" or even "the lonely cry of a beast"

Bouncy Erbear (4:23:35 PM): something less human

Bouncy Erbear (4:23:37 PM): but no

Bouncy Erbear (4:23:39 PM): you went with woman

lynxgriffin (4:23:49 PM): :3

Bouncy Erbear (4:23:51 PM): granted it's faint but still

Bouncy Erbear (4:24:21 PM): also, why use cage if it's not like a cage at all....cage gives different pictures than what you described, like i said

lynxgriffin (4:24:59 PM): yeah, it's a liiiittle fuzzy for me, too XD

Love, Love, Love Makes the World Go Round <3

2008-11-19T01:52:52Z

Fine, why the hell not, everyone needs a little reminder that they are loved by someone.

Leave me a comment and I will reply with why I like you. If I don't know you, I'll either make something up or tell you why I like your LiveJournal. ~~You must pay for the privilege by posting a message like this one on your LiveJournal.~~

CHRISTMAS/HOLIDAY OF YOUR CHOICE CARDS! 8D

2008-11-11T00:27:34Z

GIVE ME YOUR ADDRESSES! *___*

Right, so, it's that time of year again, the time to start getting addresses for holiday/christmas cards 8D

This year I'm doing it a little earlier because, well 1) I can. and 2) I want to include something extra.

SO

-> Give me your name and address where you will want your Xmas card sent.

-> Request (if you want) a doodle or drabble from me to include in the card.

Request Form (make sure to tell me if you prefer a doodle or a drabble or if you don't care)
Fandom:
Characters and/or Pairing:
Theme: (Preferably something Christmas-y/Holiday related but if you want it to be a generic theme that's good too 8D)

-> Hit post. Comments should be screened but if they are not please let me know (sometimes fails at setting that up ^_^; )

-> Expect a card come December 8D

Also...

2008-04-08T07:46:14Z

I totally just changed my username...samurai_usagi is no longer...don't worry...the way LJ works you don't have to re-friend me or anything...whoot

Pretty, Pretty Princess

2008-03-27T21:59:22Z

Find Out Which Disney Girl You Are!
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Mulan

A free spirit, a beautiful soul, all things that most people would tag on a lovely girly girl - but you're more boy than anything! Sometimes you're considered a 'nerd' or 'dork', but that just comes with the package - you even embrace your inner nerd. Go you!

Mulan

79%

Snow White

71%

Alice

67%

Pocahontas

67%

Jane

63%

Aurora (Sleeping Beauty)

58%

Belle

54%

Jasmine

54%

Tinkerbell

50%

Ariel

50%

Violet

46%

Megara

42%

Esmerelda

38%

Cinderella

21%

Movie Meme

2008-03-19T04:45:48Z

OR finding interesting ways to procrastinate

1. Pick 21 favorite movies.
2. Go to IMDb and find a quote from each movie.
3. Post them here for everyone to guess.
4. Fill in the film title once it's guessed.
5. NO googling/using IMDb search functions!

1. "You're my son and I love you. That's why I'm giving you a head start."
2. I am Legend "What the hell are you doing out here, Fred? Fred, if you're real, you better tell me right now!"
3. Ocean's Eleven "Okay, here's the problem. Now we're stealing 2 things. And when push comes to shove, and you can't have both, which are you gonna choose, huh? And remember: Tess does not split 11 ways!"
4. V for Vendetta "Who? Who is but the form following the function of what and what I am is a man in a mask." "Well I can see that." "Of course you can. I'm not questioning your powers of observation I'm merely remarking upon the paradox of asking a masked man who he is."
5. Shrek "Oh, you both have layers. Oh. You know, not everybody like onions."
6. I Robot "I must be, like, a malfunction magnet. Because your shit keeps malfuntioning around me."
7. Cloverfield "Right...I just can't stop thinking how scary it'd be if a flaming homeless guy came running..."
8. Pirates of the Carribean "We're going to steal a ship? That ship?" "Commandeer. We're going to commandeer that ship. Nautical term."
9. Enchanted "Oh look, here's a twist! The brave princess is coming to the rescue. I guess that makes you the damsel in distress, huh, handsome?"
10. Dogma "Hey, you know, fuck you, man. Any moron with a pack of matches can set a fire. Raining down sulphur is like an endurance trial man. Mass genocide is the most exhausting activity one can engage in, outside of soccer."
11. Transformers "Hello? 911 emergency. My car's been stolen! I'm in pursuit! I need the whole squadron, bring everyone! No, no don't ask any questions, my father's the head of the neighbourhood watch!"
12. "What is she doing?" "Writing." "Can anything be done about it?"
13. Finding Nemo "Okay, don't make any sudden moves. Hop inside my mouth... if you want to live."
14. "My dad says that TV destroys brain cells." "Your dad doesn't know anything. We watch TV like every day!" "I rest my case."
15. Independence Day "Who's the man? Huh? Who's the man? Wait till I get another plane! I'm a line ya friends up right beside you! Where ya at, huh? Where ya at? Welcome to earth."
16. Hairspray "I'm very pleased and scared to be here." "Now, honey, we got more reason to be scared on your street."
17. Beauty and the Beast "As you can see, the psuedo-facade was stripped away to reveal a minimalist rococo design. Note the unusual inversely vaulted ceilings. This is yet another example of the late neoclassic Baroque period. And, as I always say, "if it's not Baroque, don't fix it!"
18. Shawn of the Dead"Who died and made you fucking king of the zombies?"
19. Hot Fuzz "I can't remember a time when I didn't want to be a police officer, apart from the summer of 1979 when I wanted to be Kermit the frog. It all started with my Uncle Derek. He was a Sergeant in the Met. He bought me a police medal car when I was five. I rode around in it every second I was awake - arresting kids twice my size for things like littering and spitting. I got beaten up a lot when I was young, but it didn't stop me. I wanted to be like Uncle Derek."
20. Monty Python and the Holy Grail "When I first came here, this was all swamp. Everyone said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp, but I built in all the same, just to show them. It sank into the swamp. So I built a second one. That sank into the swamp. So I built a third. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp. But the fourth one stayed up. And that's what you're going to get, Lad, the strongest castle in all of England.""
21. Fried Green Tomatoes "Face it, girls, I'm older and I have more insurance."

Yoinked from chibi_shiro! First Meme of the New Year!

2008-01-08T07:00:13Z

Give me two characters from different fandoms you know I’m familiar with, and I’ll give you a dialogue happening between the two of them. Without justifying how the crossover would work, how their worlds clashed, or how they could even meet each other. Just a silly crossover conversation with no backstory, for fun.

You know you want to guys ^^

Drabble Generator: Fun For Hours

2007-12-15T06:32:16Z

Bored during the holidays? Want super cracky fun? Go HERE

Some drabbles that I made:

Golden Love

Xigbar finished packing. Ever since Luxord, his own true love, had been lost at sea, Xigbar had been large.

There was nothing left for him anymore, nothing flipped him, all was skinny. So today, Valentine's Day, he was going in a jar to become a horny mime.

Just then, there was a red knock at the door. Xigbar opened it and stood there hungrily for a moment, before falling to the floor in a swoon and bruising his stomach.

When Xigbar came to, Luxord was holding his shoulder and looking old. "My love," Luxord said speedily, "I'm sorry for the magical shock. I've been shipwrecked on a shiney island for the last ten years, living like a cat that had just caught a tasty mouse. I was only rescued last week." He paused. "I lost my ear in the wreck. Can you still love me?"

Xigbar could hardly believe his Luxord had returned. "I will always love you, ear or no ear. Besides, you can cover it up with a gun."

They embraced huskily and vowed to never be parted again.

And all was smooth.

It only gets worse:

The Adventure Of The Whale

Leo and Brent were out for a super Valentine's walk on a tower. As they went, Brent rested his hand on Leo's boob. It was the most romantic walk ever. But even though the day was so cute, Leo was filled with magical dread.

"Do you suppose it's long here?" he asked darkly.

"You horny silly," Brent said, tickling Leo with his toothbrush. "It's completely dirty."

Just then, a smelly whale leapt out from behind a skateboard and humped Brent in the toe. "Aaargh!" Brent screamed.

Things looked evil. But Leo, although he was yellow, knew he had to save his love. He grabbed a hose and, like a hyperactive Demyx at an aquarium, beat the whale suprisingly until it ran off. "That will teach you to hump innocent people."

Then he clasped Brent close. Brent was bleeding sadly. "My darling," Leo said, and pressed his lips to Brent's tongue.

"I love you," Brent said swimmingly, and expired in Leo's arms.

Leo never loved again.

Much worse...

Luxord and Demyx
by William Shakespeare

Enter Luxord

Demyx appears above at a window

Luxord:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the lemon, and Demyx is the snake.
Arise, dirty snake, and ravish the sexy dress.
See, how he leans his finger upon his hip!
O, that I were a glove upon that hip,
That I might touch that finger!

Demyx:
O Luxord, Luxord! wherefore art thou Luxord?
What's in a name? That which we call a foot
By any other name would smell as smooth
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like the last package of condoms on prom night"
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove silky.

Luxord:
Swain, by yonder sexy dress I swear
That tips on a plane the skimpy tissue--

Demyx:
O, swear not by the dress, the dangerous dress,
That huskily changes in its hot orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise hot.
Sweet, horny night! A thousand times horny night!
Parting is such rougish sorrow,
That I shall say horny night till it be morrow.

Exit above

Luxord:
Sleep dwell upon thy finger, peace in thy hip!
Would I were sleep and peace, so hungrily to rest!
angrily will I to my dirty foot's cell,
Its help to ravish, and my smooth foot to tell.

Just...oh GOD

A Sharp Day To Pull

CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow stepped savagely out into the smokey sunshine, and admired Luxord's eye. "Ah," he sighed, "That's a snarky sight."

Luxord climbed off the rum and walked sarcastically across the grass to greet his lover. CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow patted Luxord on the neck and then tried to pull him hungrily, but without success.

"That's all right," Luxord said. "We can try again later."

"I'm just not smooth," CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow. "Not as smooth as the time we pulled on a bed."

Luxord nodded sweetly. "We were hot back in those days."

"Our lips were younger, and we had a lot more fun with them," CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow said. "Everything seems hateful and hungry when you're young."

"Of course," Luxord said. "But now we're tender, we can still have fun. If we go about it sexily."

"Sexily?" CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow said . "But how?"

"With this," Luxord said and held out a sexy compass. "Just take that with some water and in half an hour, you'll be ready to pull."

CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow swallowed the compass at once and sure enough, in half an hour, they were able to pull sexily. They pulled like a drunk cheerleader at a frat house. Three times.

And then the neighbour told them to get off his lawn.

Christmas Wish List

2007-12-04T17:40:57Z

- Make a post to your LJ. The post should contain your list of 10 holiday fandom wishes. The wishes can be anything at all, from simple and fun ("I'd love an icon that's just for me") to medium ("I wish for short fic about [characters here]") to really big ("All I want for Christmas is a 5000 word story about my OTP!") The important thing is, make sure these wishes are things you really, truly want.

- Also, make sure you post some version of these guidelines in your LJ so that the holiday joy will spread.

- Surf around your friendslist (or friendsfriends, or just random journals) to see who has posted their holiday fandom wish list.

- If you see a wish you can grant, and it's in your heart to do so, make someone's fandom wish come true. The point isn't to put people out, it's to provide everyone a chance to be someone else's holiday elf—to spread the joy. Gifts can be made anonymously or not—it's your call.

There are no rules with this project, no guarantees, and no strings attached. Just...wish, and it might come true. Give, and you might receive. And you'll have the joy of knowing you made someone's holiday special.

1. ...an Adam/Kensei icon
2. ...a Xigbar/Luxord drabble and/or oneshot
3. ...a Xigbar/Luxord/Xaldin drabble and/or oneshot
4. ...a crossover drabbles/fics of some of my fandoms
5. ...a picture of Luxord
6. ...a Hiro/Adam (Kensei) drabble
7. ...any Organization XIII drabbles
8. ...a picture of Xigbar/Luxord/Xaldin
9. ...Xaldin vs. Ronon Dex (Stargate: Atlantis) picture or drabble ~~cause they are badass and hot~~
10. ...a "good" Organization XIII wallpaper featuring as many members as possible for my computer

That's How You Know~

2007-12-03T19:25:59Z

OMG thanks to dewdropinn for the Enchanted soundtrack :D

And now

♥ Is it can be HUGS TIEM for (Lufi/Erbear) nao pleeze? ♥

EDIT

Oh and I determined by random number picking what themes and "couples" I will use for my XIII Days of Christmas CRACK. (Note that some are more crack than others...like Demyx...who is ~~a whore~~ good with everyone)

THE LIST
Not Necessarily In This Order
Mistletoe- Xigbar/Vexen
Tinsel- Saix/Marluxia
Candles- Lexaeus/Axel
Dance- Larxene/Xemnas
Cookies- Xaldin/Marluxia
Lights- Luxord/Roxas
Carol- Lexaeus/Demyx
Snow- Larxene/Vexen
Ornament- Marluxia/Zexion
Gift- Axel/Xigbar
Colors- Saix/Demyx
Magic- Luxord/Zexion
Cocoa- Xaldin/Roxas

Christmas Project: FICS

2007-11-29T20:20:08Z

XIII Days of Christmas Crack
For Christmas I want to bring you guys thirteen days of glorious crack pairings between our lovely Organization. Problem is, it's hard to think of crack pairings...so...TIME FOR SUGGESTIONS!

Here's what I got so far that I may do...options would be lovely though since I wouldn't want TOO many character repeats. So when the list gets bigger some of these may be dropped:
Luxord/Saix
Xigbar/Axel
Luxord/Roxas
Larxene/Xigbar
Xaldin/Roxas
Larxene/Vexen
Lexaeus/Axel
Xigbar/Vexen
Larxene/Xemnas
Zexion/Luxord
Xemnas/Xibgar
Xaldin/Marluxia
Xemnas/Vexen
Saix/Demyx
Xigbar/Roxas
Saix/Marluxia
Marluxia/Zexion
Xaldin/Demyx
Xemnas/Axel
Lexaeus/Larxene
Lexaeus/Demyx
Everyone/Everyone (thanks x_igrab)

See...that's not XIII pairings...I need crack pairings now please...and I'd also really like at least one of each member. I suppose I can do a few drawings from a hat for crack pairings as well. But I'd like to see what YOU all want to see :3

HELP PLEASE SO I CAN GIVE YOU GUYS A MAGICAL CRACK XMAS

Celebrate Good Times Come On!

2007-11-25T20:45:42Z

Oh my Gosh! This Friday is my Birthday! :DD

We had cake at my Grandma's today and I got the Heroes Season One Box Set as my present! Yay!

I can't believe I'll be 20 soon @_@

So anyways...I realized I still had Xmas cards left over from last year so if any of you guys would like an Xmas card from me leave your address (should be screened if I set that up right) and I'll actually try to send them this year XD

Oh! And I want to see the movie Enchanted. I've heard good things. ~~Donna let's go see it, plz?~~ The Golden Compass looks good too...but it's not out yet.

Before I Go To Bed...

2007-08-19T06:17:25Z

Post and tell me anonymously:

1. One secret.
2. One compliment.
3. One non-compliment.
4. One love note.
5. Lyrics to a song.
6. How old you are.
7. How long we've been friends.
8. And a hint to who you are.

This will entertain me tomorrow after I unpack and MOVE IN TO MY NEW APARTMENT OMG SQUEE!

FRIENDS ONLY!

2006-05-04T01:13:19Z

FRIENDS ONLY

If you are already my friend, you might want to log in to see anything relevant. If you are not my friend and wish to be then have at it...just make sure you actually leave a comment every once in awhile and let me know you care! Also check out my Writing Journal: hitsuzen_heroes